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"Happy Birthday to you,
 Happy Birthday to you,
 Happy Birthday, Uncle Daveeeee,
 Happy Birthday to you!" The twins launch themselves at my giant birthday cake, spluttering all over it trying to blow out my candles.
 Gotta love friends who don’t know you anymore. I haven’t eaten sugar since 2010. When Lucy was born and my best friend stopped being a daddy and went full-on DAD.
He was 42 when he and that dickhead ex of his decided they wanted to be parents. Ew.
He's 62 now. A

Artwork by @davolicx Ryan Sniffies 3:20pm Hey bud. What's up Ryan Sniffies 3:51pm You free tonight? Ryan Sniffies 4:37pm Need that ass Ryan Sniffies 5:01pm You around? I don't think I should. Not again. But it's looking dire on the apps. Why the fuck did I ever move out to bum-fuck nowhere?! Moving from Shoreditch to the Home Counties made sense when all we talked about was settling down and having kids. It made sense. Three years later, divorced, single, and blue-ball